When a Book Becomes a Bridge
Reflections and practical guidance from our community reading at the Closter Public Library
There is something magical about watching a story leave the page and become a conversation.
At the community launch of Where Do You Go When You’re Not With Me at the Closter Public Library, families gathered for a morning of reading, music, art and honest conversation about something many young children experience: being apart from the grown-ups they love.
The book was born from a question my son asked after a difficult daycare drop-off. But that morning, it became something larger. Children imagined what their grown-ups might be doing while they were apart. Parents shared ideas that had helped their own families. Educators offered practical guidance grounded in years of caring for young children.
And together, we reminded our kids that even when we are not in the same place, our connection continues.
Wisdom from two extraordinary educators
I was honored to be joined by Ms. Pearl and Ms. Haily from All About Me Early Learning Centers in Cresskill. They are not only trusted educators. They are part of my children’s story.
All About Me has cared for River and Ava since our family moved to the neighborhood three years ago. Ms. Pearl, Ms. Haily and the rest of the team have helped nurture, teach and raise them through some of their most formative years. They have become a second family to our children, and to us.
During our library conversation, Ms. Pearl reminded parents that every child adjusts to separation differently. There is no single timeline or perfect drop-off routine. What matters is offering consistency and reassurance while keeping communication open between home and care.
Ms. Haily spoke about the importance of truly knowing each child and understanding what helps that particular child feel safe. Something as simple as keeping a family photograph nearby can offer comfort and a tangible reminder of home.
Their guidance reinforced an important truth: supporting separation is not about asking children to stop missing us. It is about giving them dependable ways to feel connected until we return.
Four ways to bridge the time apart
Families at the event also received a complimentary caregiver guide created with Peace at Home Parenting Solutions. The guide is organized around four simple bridges that can help carry a child from separation to reconnection:
Ready: Prepare your child for what will happen and give them language they can understand.
Remind: Offer a familiar object, photograph, phrase or ritual that reminds them of your connection.
Relay: Share helpful information between home and the child’s caregiver so support feels consistent.
Reconnect: Create a dependable reunion ritual that allows your child to feel seen, heard and welcomed home.
These practices do not eliminate every tear or difficult goodbye. They give children something steady to hold onto while they learn that love remains constant, even when we are apart.
One of the practices we use in our own family is the refrain at the heart of the book:
When you’re thinking of me, I’m thinking of you.
Learning from one another
Some of the most meaningful guidance that morning came directly from the parents in the room.
One parent shared that when a grown-up travels, they bring one of the child’s favorite stuffed animals along and photograph its adventures. The pictures become a story the family can enjoy together when the grown-up returns.
The children offered their own beautiful perspectives through art. One child drew her family saying goodbye before her father left for a work trip. Others colored scenes from the book or imagined what their grown-ups might be doing during the day.
The room became more than the setting for a reading. It became a place where families could exchange ideas, feel understood and leave with new ways to support their children.
Continue the conversation at home
If your family is navigating daycare, preschool, travel, shared caregiving or any other time apart, I hope the book and caregiver guide help you create reassuring rituals of your own.
GET THE COMPLIMENTARY CAREGIVER GUIDE:
Sign up for the Common Language Press newsletter to receive the downloadable guide and hear about future readings, family resources and community events.
PURCHASE THE BOOK:
Where Do You Go When You’re Not With Me is available in hardcover and paperback on Amazon.
I am deeply grateful to Ms. Pearl, Ms. Haily and the entire All About Me family for the love and care they have given my children. Thank you to Vida DeLeon and the Closter Public Library for bringing our community together, and to Peace at Home Parenting Solutions for helping transform the heart of this story into a practical resource for families.
This is what I hoped Common Language Press could create: not simply books to read, but books worth talking about.
